Domestic violence

zdcol71 · 17-05-2011, 02:06 PM

I have just heard on the ABC news one of the most tragic stories I have heard in quite a while.
Seems a father and his 5 year old daughters' bodies have been found in Northern NSW, a short time after the girls mother and partners' bodies were also found. I am sure this topic will have made its way onto here sooner or later, I just wanted to pre- empt it by asking for a little thought before posting. I'm probably not alone here in having experienced similar situations, and despite whatever we may think or care to believe, there is always more than the black or white. There is a little 5 year old boy left behind.
So sad for everyone involved.

fmc351 · 17-05-2011, 02:33 PM

This must be the story to go with the alert on ABC last night, police were asking for public assistance to locate a car, reg number was displayed etc and said to be in Nthn NSW.

Whatever the background story, its just horrific.

SEZ213 · 17-05-2011, 02:54 PM

The brother was 20 months old, surviving because he was at his grandparents. I read this earlier this morning and it made me very sad. I hope others understand it's not always black and white zdcol, I really do. I for one couldn't imagine what the father must have been thinking at the time if this was the only solution for him...I guess the one upside of this situation is that the public can't complete their lynching of this bloke, although it's not really an upside...

JC · 17-05-2011, 03:02 PM

Let's not go too hard on the bloke that murdered 3 people and killed himself! Are you kidding? It is perhaps an endictment on our (mental) health system though, or perhaps the family courts, but I'm sorry, apart from (self) defence, there is no good reason to kill in my books.

Road_Warrior · 17-05-2011, 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JC

there is no good reason to kill in my books.

Let alone your own child.

ELGT4me · 17-05-2011, 04:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Road_Warrior

Let alone your own child.

I agree 100%, sadly there is too much of this happening. I don't know the reason, or situation as to why this happened, but to me there can be no excuse or reason. So very sad.

84xespac · 17-05-2011, 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JC

Let's not go too hard on the bloke that murdered 3 people and killed himself! Are you kidding? It is perhaps an endictment on our (mental) health system though, or perhaps the family courts, but I'm sorry, apart from (self) defence, there is no good reason to kill in my books.

I agree whole heartedly with what you have said, not knowing the circumstances for this terrible act to have happened all we can do is speculate as to the reasons. I can however tell you that in the time of mental anguish felt by fathers trying to get access to their children the only way they feel they can be with their childrenis in death. This is the sad part about our family law system here in this country and world wide. The actual statistics for the suicide rate of men world wide due to family law court battles is 1 death every 45 seconds if I remember correctly. I am not defending this fathers actions at all but please keep in mind that at the time he commited the act he would have been in a very fragil state.
This is a topic very close to my own heart having been through the wringer of family law court myself, as some of you on here who know me personally I haven't seen my own kids in several years. I also spend a lot of my spare time helping fathers who are unable for what ever reason from being able to see their own kids. Some of those very fathers are members of this forum as well so please be respectful in what you say in response to this thread as it isn't always black and white.

GT 160 · 17-05-2011, 04:30 PM

Im sorry, but the guy is a gutless coward no matter how bad things are there is absolutely no excuse for doing this.

Jim Goose · 17-05-2011, 05:55 PM

there was just this week that guy who climbed Sydney Harbour bridge in protest about family courts being biased towards the mother.

Also remember the guy in Melb who threw his daughter from the bridge 2yrs ago? The guy who drove his car into the lake with his 3kids....

Something isnt right there at all when a parent kills their kids and themselves.. wether its the courts or a mental issue we probably wont know.

But no at the end of the day... its not right to do that to your own flesh and blood. Let alone yourself.

Bucknaked · 17-05-2011, 06:02 PM

There is no excuse for taking the life of your child. Any child. Any life.

devilcv8 · 17-05-2011, 07:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bucknaked

There is no excuse for taking the life of your child. Any child. Any life.

I don't understand how any parent can harm any child let alone their own flesh and blood. May the mongrel rot in hell for his cowardly actions.

bingoTE50 · 17-05-2011, 07:21 PM

No excuse for his actions .

mattyv74 · 17-05-2011, 07:38 PM

Why is this **** even on our forum? Surely this is a place for us to enjoy and share our interests.
The whole situation so sad and unessisary. Makes me feel sick. I watch the news every day, and read the paper, but some times a really think twice befor picking it up. :(

**ebxr8240** · 17-05-2011, 08:08 PM

It's a situation not too many understand...

MO · 17-05-2011, 09:31 PM

Most of the problem is the system,you have state courts handling family matters then you have the federal court also handling these matters.
Not to mention the various agencies that get involved like the CSA etc.

Its no wonder there are problems it should be down to the one court which can order properly on custody and visiting etc. There should also be a mental health unit to assess both parents and children to hopefully prevent this sort of thing.

The system/s are a minefield and it needs fixing.

Big Bird 17 · 17-05-2011, 09:53 PM

I've had a marriage go bad and i was in a pretty bad way but even at my lowest and most depressed state of mind when i was missing my kids and felt like ending it all did i at any time think of harming my kids in any way.I think it was a gutless and very selfish act.
My thoughts and condolences go out to the respective families trying to make some sort of sense out of this horrible tragedy if that is possible.

fasty73 · 17-05-2011, 09:23 PM

84xespac, all I can say is "HERE HERE". I feel the same pain you describe!!

GS608 · 18-05-2011, 10:03 AM

a bit more on this..she served me a few times down at the local tavern..

Quote:

Days after the tragic Gold Coast triple murder-suicide, it has been claimed Tania Simpson had been terrified of her estranged fiancé Paul Rogers after she called off their wedding in November.

The 31-year-old mother needed to be escorted to her car after work and was scared Rogers would one day come after her, the Courier Mail reports.

The friend, "Mick", said he worked with Ms Simpson at the Robina Tavern.

"She was worried about her past," he said.

"She did say there was a bloke in the past and she would like to get escorted to her car every night just in case.

"She said he was capable of doing something bad but she didn't know what it was."

The horrific killings left dead five-year-old Kyla, her mother Tania, and her new partner Antony Way, 33, as well as Kyla's 40-year-old father Rogers.

Kyla was found to be missing after her mother and her mother's partner were found stabbed to death.

The body of the five-year-old was found in a car with her dead father the next day. It's believed Mr Rogers may have ingested some sort of poison before gassing himself and his daughter.

Kyla's 20-month-old brother Bronson was spared as he was staying with his grandparents.

Police said there was "no history at all" of domestic violence or family court disputes between Ms Simpson and Mr Rogers.

People close to the family said Ms Simpson and Mr Rogers planned to marry, until she walked out on their eight-year relationship.

Mr Way and Mr Rogers had known each other since their teens having grown up with each other in New Zealand.

"I don't think Paul ever got his head around the idea Tania had left him, then she took up with one of his friends," a friend of the couple, who asked not to be named, said.

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/national/...-lived-in-fear

**ebxr8240** · 18-05-2011, 04:26 PM

Umm I think you'll find the children warn't his...
Yet family court said he had to pay etc..
Much much more to this than it seems...

GT 160 · 18-05-2011, 04:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ebxr8240

Umm I think you'll find the children warn't his...
Yet family court said he had to pay etc..
Much much more to this than it seems...

Jim Goose · 18-05-2011, 04:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ebxr8240

Umm I think you'll find the children warn't his...
Yet family court said he had to pay etc..
Much much more to this than it seems...

Umm and you know this how?

MO · 18-05-2011, 04:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ebxr8240

Umm I think you'll find the children warn't his...
Yet family court said he had to pay etc..
Much much more to this than it seems...

I think you should read post #18.

ELGT4me · 18-05-2011, 05:00 PM

Whether they were his kids or not, why take out your grievances on a 5 year old girl? Without going into boring details, I too have been fleeced by the CSA & Family Law Court, I have my grievances with my ex & the CSA & judicial system in Australia. My problems with them does not give me the right to harm my children. So what if the girl was not his child, that does not give him the right to end her life. I could add more, but lets keep this civilised.

SEZ213 · 18-05-2011, 05:04 PM

Awesome 'friend' he had...it would seem she moved on pretty quickly. My mind is thinking that perhaps she'd moved on long before she actually left...

And no, I'm not suggesting that's an excuse at all...just an observation.

84xespac · 18-05-2011, 05:20 PM

Just to try and give everyone some perspective to "inside the minds" of dads that have huge child support payments or have been denied access to there kids. (again this is still only speculation that he has been denied access).
Also as I stated before I am not condoning his actions in any way shape or form.
http://www.dadsindistress.asn.au/www...t.aspx?cid=795

http://www.dadsindistress.asn.au/www...t.aspx?cid=768

The above site is a fantastic oranisation guy and I urge any of you out there reading this that are going through the family law court or a dad in distress to reach out to someone. There is alot of helpfull information on this site and people who are willing to listen. Please don't become a statistic.
I would also like to say that if you need someone to talk to, to cry to or even to scream about how the wrong the system is please don't hesitate to send me a pm. I am always willing to listen and help if I can. I have certs in social services which I got for the sole purpose of helping fellow dads that are going through what I have been through and continue to go through each and everyday.

zdcol71 · 18-05-2011, 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 84xespac

Just to try and give everyone some perspective to "inside the minds" of dads that have huge child support payments or have been denied access to there kids. (again this is still only speculation that he has been denied access).
Also as I stated before I am not condoning his actions in any way shape or form.
http://www.dadsindistress.asn.au/www...t.aspx?cid=795

http://www.dadsindistress.asn.au/www...t.aspx?cid=768

The above site is a fantastic oranisation guy and I urge any of you out there reading this that are going through the family law court or a dad in distress to reach out to someone. There is alot of helpfull information on this site and people who are willing to listen. Please don't become a statistic.
I would also like to say that if you need someone to talk to, to cry to or even to scream about how the wrong the system is please don't hesitate to send me a pm. I am always willing to listen and help if I can. I have certs in social services which I got for the sole purpose of helping fellow dads that are going through what I have been through and continue to go through each and everyday.

For those who think maybe this forum isn't the place for this sort of thing, this response is a great indication of why it so very much is. As a group of (I'm guessing) predominantly male members, discussing very much "men" things, we are probably not collectively aware of the huge amount of issues facing a huge amount of "us" that don't directly relate to our passions/obsessions/hobbies . It is all to easy to get caught up in the things we do and loose grip on the things that really matter sometimes, and to have someone share their knowledge and experiences on things other than the cars that we probably all joined to discuss, is one of the reasons I keep tuning in. Great post.

v gate · 18-05-2011, 06:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sezzy

Awesome 'friend' he had...it would seem she moved on pretty quickly. My mind is thinking that perhaps she'd moved on long before she actually left...

And no, I'm not suggesting that's an excuse at all...just an observation.

BINGO shut one door before you open another. Thats why i dont mess about cause if you would'nt like it done to you dont do it to them.

Road Games · 18-05-2011, 06:28 PM

Seriously this discussion is not for the Ford Forum.. i come here to relax and discuss cars and forget my troubles !!

For those who aren't on my Facebook, Tanya and i used to sing karaoke at Robina Tavern on a wed night where she used to work ..

Well freak me if they arent talking about it all over the bloody news ...its on here as well ?!!

ELGT4me · 18-05-2011, 06:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by XR6menace

Seriously this discussion is not for the Ford Forum.. i come here to relax and discuss cars and forget my troubles !!

For those who aren't on my Facebook, Tanya and i used to sing karaoke at Robina Tavern on a wed night where she used to work ..

Well freak me if they arent talking about it all over the bloody news ...its on here as well ?!!

As we ALL do, but some of us are dads, some of us have nieces/nephews, most of us like kids, all of us are horrified at the alarming increase of supposed adults doing harm to kids. I cannot bring myself to say the (M) word. Yeah, I like my performance cars, but gee I look forward to passing on my car enthusiasm to my kids, or the kid down the street, or the neighbours kid. Kids are our future, not our demise.

MO · 18-05-2011, 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by XR6menace

Seriously this discussion is not for the Ford Forum.. i come here to relax and discuss cars and forget my troubles !!

For those who aren't on my Facebook, Tanya and i used to sing karaoke at Robina Tavern on a wed night where she used to work ..

Well freak me if they arent talking about it all over the bloody news ...its on here as well ?!!

You know you don't have to read it.
I suspect you've got a fair insight to what happens in divorces.