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The Bar For non Automotive Related Chat

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Old 30-11-2006, 11:34 AM   #1
csv8
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Wink Dictionary For Women's Personal Ads

DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS (slightly updated, if u've seen this before)

40-ish = 49
Adventurous = Slept with everyone
Athletic = No tits
Average looking = Ugly
Beautiful = Pathological liar
Contagious Smile = Does a lot of pills
Emotionally secure = On medication
Feminist = Fat
Free spirit = Junkie
Friendship first = Former very *friendly* person
Fun = Annoying
New Age = Body hair in the wrong places
Open-minded = Desperate
Outgoing = Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate = Sloppy drunk
Professional = *****
Voluptuous = Very Fat
Large frame = Hugely Fat
Wants Soul mate = Stalker





WOMEN'S ENGLISH:

1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No
4. We need = I want
5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
6. We need to talk = you're in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = you better not
8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later
9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron!
10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?





MEN'S ENGLISH



1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = let's have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you
11. Those shoes don't go with that outfit = I'm gay





And finally.....



A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle .
For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with rugged, masculine features. However when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside.

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Old 30-11-2006, 11:39 AM   #2
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lol funny. especially the personal ads
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Old 30-11-2006, 11:45 AM   #3
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Personal adds were gold!!!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by HOMER SIMPSON

When a woman says there's nothing wrong, that means everything's wrong. And when a woman says everything's wrong - everything's wrong. And when a woman says something's not funny - you'd better not laugh your *** off!
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Old 30-11-2006, 11:52 AM   #4
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bahahah thats gold.....whats the link to the original. i believe that would be a good read...
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Old 30-11-2006, 12:03 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by photn
bahahah thats gold.....whats the link to the original. i believe that would be a good read...
I cut and paste from an email I was sent. So, don't know original site.
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Old 30-11-2006, 12:27 PM   #6
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hehe love it and seen similar before, if only it was that black and white for us !
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Old 30-11-2006, 12:39 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bluedriver
hehe love it and seen similar before, if only it was that black and white for us !
it isnt ??? lol hehehehehehe

just jokes lol hehehe
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Old 30-11-2006, 02:56 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by csv8
10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?
Ummm.. yes!!?
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Old 30-11-2006, 03:49 PM   #9
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Classic. And how true is the male english!!!
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Old 30-11-2006, 04:09 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by csv8
And finally.....



A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle .
For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with rugged, masculine features. However when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside.
Oh so true.... : lol
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