fri funnies

[Dodge]

add ur friday joke here

A father walks into a book store with his young son. The boy is holding a quarter. Suddenly, the boy starts choking, going blue in the face. The father realizes the boy has swallowed the quarter and starts panicking, shouting for help.

A well dressed, attractive and serious looking woman, in a blue business suit is sitting at a coffee bar reading a newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down, neatly folds the newspaper and places it on the counter, gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurried, across the book store.

Reaching the boy, the woman carefully drops his pants; takes hold of the boy's t**ticles and starts to squeeze and twist, gently at first and then ever so firmly. After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the quarter, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand.

Releasing the boy's t**ticles, the woman hands the coin to the father and walks back to her seat in the coffee bar without saying a word.

As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no ill effects, the father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that before, it was fantastic. Are you a doctor?"

"No," the woman replied, "Divorce attorney."

[WizBang]

not bad not bad at all

[DOC]

An old one i remember

A proud father walks into the bar with his son, and says to the barmaid behind the bar give us 12 beers in a row on the bar please.

the barmaid says " you must be celebrating something really special ", the father replied yep today my son had his first h**d j*b, "wow says the barmaid thats great, i'll buy you another one to help you celebrate.

The son replied " Na that's OK if 12 wont wash it down nothing will "

enjoy your friday

[Thornie]

a guy walks into a bar and says to the bartender " i'll have 30 shots of your finest whiskey please". So the bartender pours the shots and at $20 a shot they were the finest. anyway they guy slams them all down in less then a couple of minutes and the bar tender asks "why slam them down in such a short time".
The man replies "you would too if you have I i've got"
bartender asks "whats that"

the bloke smirks and say's "75 cents"