what is the dumest thing you have seen some one do to a engine

[GT450]

Exactly.

[XG_Falcon]

Originally Posted by asagaai

I will throw the hat in the ring about me. Was mowing the lawn with my 2 stroke victa- running late on a very hot afternoon, had a barbie planned and was looking forward to some cold beers.

Petrol was running low- ie started spluttering, piece of crap mower always went through the juice fast. Instead of turning off- in a burst of brainwave brilliance, left on, got can of petrol, and without funnel hurriedly poured petrol in, with some petrol missing the mark-end result machine burst alight, fire spreading from machine and then onto lawn....which was dry and on a hot summers day the fire spread...and fire spread towards the can in my hand....

Flurried backstep to avoid can in my hand exploding, and by the time I had put the fire out, there was one melted victa lawn mower and a black round circle in the lawn that looked like a UFO had landed.


But best thing I could have done, got rid of that 2 stroke piece of crap and now have a 4 stroke Honda....so actually it was an intentional act of brilliance by me....

Alright, I've already spoken to asagaai about how this story brought up some bittersweet memories.

It reminded me of when I was 19 and my parents told me to mow the lawn but I had been drinking all day. I was drunk. I started mowing but we have a big yard and the tank ran low on fuel. I did basically the exact same thing asagaai did: poured fuel into the tank and spilled it on the engine casing which was hot enough to ignite everything in the tank! Luckily I had moved the jerry can away so that didn't explode.

I ended up with some nasty second and third degree burns, mainly on my right leg. I had to fight the fire while I was still actually ON FIRE to stop the 5L jerry can going up and to stop the shed/garden from lighting on fire.

I remember yelling out loud for help but I knew nobody was coming It wasn't until I limped into the house after putting out the (massive) fire that anybody knew what had happened.

Somehow I managed to save the mower by jumping through the inferno and pushing it out the way. My dad had bought the mower just a few months before though so he was still irate with me and wouldn't take me to hospital even though I was badly burned .

any way, this happened 4 years ago but this post immediately reminded me of it. I am always sober before I mow the lawn now!!!

The mower still works just fine.

[noflac52]

The dumbest thing I ever did was to a transit van with the v4 engine. I tried to drive it!

[asagaai]

Originally Posted by XG_Falcon

Alright, I've already spoken to asagaai about how this story brought up some bittersweet memories.

It reminded me of when I was 19 and my parents told me to mow the lawn but I had been drinking all day. I was drunk. I started mowing but we have a big yard and the tank ran low on fuel. I did basically the exact same thing asagaai did: poured fuel into the tank and spilled it on the engine casing which was hot enough to ignite everything in the tank! Luckily I had moved the jerry can away so that didn't explode.

I ended up with some nasty second and third degree burns, mainly on my right leg. I had to fight the fire while I was still actually ON FIRE to stop the 5L jerry can going up and to stop the shed/garden from lighting on fire.

I remember yelling out loud for help but I knew nobody was coming It wasn't until I limped into the house after putting out the (massive) fire that anybody knew what had happened.

Somehow I managed to save the mower by jumping through the inferno and pushing it out the way. My dad had bought the mower just a few months before though so he was still irate with me and wouldn't take me to hospital even though I was badly burned .

any way, this happened 4 years ago but this post immediately reminded me of it. I am always sober before I mow the lawn now!!!

The mower still works just fine.

Ha- at least your excuse was you were 19 and drunk....

Me- older fart who should have known better, sober, and hanging out for that coldie and just ****ed that the spluttering mower was between me and that ale- so no excuse my end.

[XG_Falcon]

Originally Posted by asagaai

Ha- at least your excuse was you were 19 and drunk....

Me- older fart who should have known better, sober, and hanging out for that coldie and just ****ed that the spluttering mower was between me and that ale- so no excuse my end.

Thanks mate but I still should have known better, youth and the drink is no excuse for stupidity

It was a good lesson to learn though.

[jpblue1000]

There were rumors or even true story circulating the internetz of a lad doing his own port and polish job on a running engine by allowing it to ingest a fine porting powder through the intake. No doubt it didn't go well and the internetz went into flame frenzy. Oh the good times that were had by so many!

It wasnt me!

JP

[tranquilized]

Originally Posted by QIKESP

Going back a few years... I was filling my car up at the local servo and noticed an older lady had the bonnet up on a brand new Honda Euro. I had to look twice, but she had just filled the engine up with 4 ltrs of water from the servo watering can ?!
Since she was oblivious what was about to happen to the engine, I walked over and politely explained what she had just done and offered a recommendation that she not start the car and get it towed over to the dealership before any damage occured.
I was told she was going to call her husband and ask what to do....after I'd just explained it.
Anyhow, I'm paying for the fuel and watching out the shop window... off she drives in this brand new Honda with 4 ltrs of water in the engine.
I can only imagine the milkshake once down the road !

What is it with Honda owners?

I used to work at a Ford dealer who had Honda and others also. The story spread like wildfire about the customer who bought their Honda in for repair - the engine had been filled with water, and the radiator was low as well... ahh green stuff in there, must be... dishwashing detergent! Even more amazing is they managed to save the engine, must not have been ran for long with it's new fluids.

[Sprint]

When I was young cough *18

A friend filled up his new engine in his Torana with coolant concentrate, I mean concentrate and no water haha, it soon went real thick.

I also thought I knew how to tune a holley before I had brains and thought the fuel bowl level screw was a extra mixture screw haha.

[Streets]

Originally Posted by jpblue1000

There were rumors or even true story circulating the internetz of a lad doing his own port and polish job on a running engine by allowing it to ingest a fine porting powder through the intake. No doubt it didn't go well and the internetz went into flame frenzy. Oh the good times that were had by so many!

It wasnt me!

JP

I remember seeing that. There was also the one where the guy thought he could increase the power of his engine by routing the exhaust directly back into the intake or something like that. Not sure if they were genuine or just trying to get a reaction but they were pretty great threads.

[Ross 1]

Neighbour in the UK getting his brother to adjust something on his VW Beetle engine whilst he turned it on and off to see if the adjustment had worked. Belt took his forefinger clean off. Darwin awards candidate

[sprintman1]

Not much beats leaning over an engine on the dyno in front of a bunch of students and the flywheel lets go taking a fair chunk of his body off and he bleeds to death in front of 'em. Happened right here, not to be recommended.

[Ratmick]

There was a guy in the States that wanted to use some sort of octane modifier additive in his fuel tank and ended up using a soft drink with the same-ish name.

Ah here we go...only in the US.

161 pages of LOLs.

[99AUXR]

Yea my two old favourites were the NOS and Port n Polish threads.

One thread but not really an engine failure I enjoyed was the Gearboxing saga involving doorsteps

[Sprint]

Originally Posted by sprintman1

Not much beats leaning over an engine on the dyno in front of a bunch of students and the flywheel lets go taking a fair chunk of his body off and he bleeds to death in front of 'em. Happened right here, not to be recommended.

Sorry but this sounds way too far fetched.

[G6ET2010]

Many years ago I owned a VH SLE just dropped a new engine in it a 308 stroker 355 bought it of a local engine builder who just happened to have built it for a customer who had run out of money so it was a complete 355 making around 450hp@engine.
I dont know what was up with my mechanic that day but lets just say it would have to be a day i bet he still wishes to forget about.
Cut a long story short somehow he filed the engine up with twice the amount of engine oil that was needed and i was wondering why it was running rough to say the least.
I happened to be with a good mate of mine who's house was just around the corner and both himself and his brother just happened to know a fair bit about cars/engines. So I swapped drivers seats with my mate he just made it to his house and "boom" my brand new 355 had flames coming out of the bonnet.
Lucky not much damage but yeah that would have to be the most dumb thing an experienced mechanic has ever done to one of my cars.

[sprintman1]

Originally Posted by Sprint

Sorry but this sounds way too far fetched.

Nope happened right here at Reid TAFE in the ACT. Nationally known race engine builder John Egan and CIT teacher who broke the cardinal rule. VW midget engine from memory. It's mentioned on performance forum and others

[bazza91]

Quick google showed 1 result for reported deaths at act tafes and that was a student who died on a horse.
I think teachers death by dyno in front of students would have been newsworthy, but i cant find anything about it?
Got an article i can read?

[sprintman1]

Originally Posted by bazza91

Quick google showed 1 result for reported deaths at act tafes and that was a student who died on a horse.
I think teachers death by dyno in front of students would have been newsworthy, but i cant find anything about it?
Got an article i can read?

Vwclubwa.com forum has all the info on the report from the magistrates court. It makes sobering reading. Look for thread a sliced VW Scat engine.

[Crazy Dazz]

In terms of LOOKING dumb...
In its final years my EB ran only on gas (after the fuel pump shat itself) and it was prone to get airlocks in the convertor and freezing up especially when it was very cold as the thermostat wouldn't allow much flow.
So late one night in winter I am driving back from Kalgoorlie, and out there it gets DAMN cold. Converter freezes up, so there I am by the side of the road, bonnet up, ****ing on my converter to thaw it out.

[bazza91]

I read that thread. Definitely a curious case.
Link for those who wish to read it http://vwclubwa.com/4-talk-box/9275-...vw-scat-engine

[sprintman1]

Originally Posted by bazza91

I read that thread. Definitely a curious case.
Link for those who wish to read it http://vwclubwa.com/4-talk-box/9275-...vw-scat-engine

I was at Walkers in Sydney one day when they were dyno testing and I couldn't forget the Egan case. I kept well away from the dyno room window and I was on the outside!!

[AAXR8]

Originally Posted by G6ET2010

Many years ago I owned a VH SLE just dropped a new engine in it a 308 stroker 355 bought it of a local engine builder who just happened to have built it for a customer who had run out of money so it was a complete 355 making around 450hp@engine.
I dont know what was up with my mechanic that day but lets just say it would have to be a day i bet he still wishes to forget about.
Cut a long story short somehow he filed the engine up with twice the amount of engine oil that was needed and i was wondering why it was running rough to say the least.
I happened to be with a good mate of mine who's house was just around the corner and both himself and his brother just happened to know a fair bit about cars/engines. So I swapped drivers seats with my mate he just made it to his house and "boom" my brand new 355 had flames coming out of the bonnet.
Lucky not much damage but yeah that would have to be the most dumb thing an experienced mechanic has ever done to one of my cars.

Did the Mechanic actually rebuild it for you under a warranty?
Or you didn't want him near the Engine again?

[Brodes]

Slightly off topic, we convinced a mate you could by bolt on cylinders for cheap extra grunt.

[marty351]

^^^^ Like my old mate thinking Harley Davidsons were V8s.

[TUF_302]

I remember reading somewhere about some young guy in the states with one of those early 90s Mustangs, he was tricked basically into flushing his motor with water after a service and started it, or something like that, was a fair while ago, might have even came across it on hear

[blackf6]

I didn't want to mow the lawn. Filled the fuel tank with water. Chores done.

[Spurious]

I once saw an oriental gentleman remove some coolant from a radiator in order to top it up with chemweld.
He syphoned it out orally with a short length or garden hose!!! (yeh he copped a mouthfull)

[Spurious]

My then brother in law worked part time at a 4x4 mechanics in Queanbeyan, NSW.
One mechanic there told me he had to call a customer back in after a service 'cause he'd neglected to refill the transfer case with lubricant.

The lady owner brings the vehicle in & out of curiosity he asked her how far she'd driven.

When she left the workshop in Queanbeyan (with an empty transfer case) she drove home to Belconnen A.C.T.
She then towed her trailer out to Captains flat NSW & cut herself a load of wood, then drove back to Belconnen. Then she drove it back to the workshop. Total estimated travel distance of 140km

Apparently no damage done to the transfer case & he refilled it with the same lube that was used prior to the service.
The one thing the mechanic said that'll stick with me forever, "Thank god for Slick 50".

[arronm]

It all started out like this.

I tried to notch my dipstick but cut it off.

Can I weld it or will superglue be OK.



The below was suggested....., but all went terribly wrong.......

Originally Posted by Davehoos View Post
cut off the top of the tube to adjust it. don't know if it fits easily but one of the EA engines had a longer stick and tube.

visit a wrecker

weld-braze to it to extend it.
super glue is not good when heated.


You were right , I couldn't find my welder so I just used super glue. I checked the oil after fixing it and it was perfect. Then I went for a drive and then checked the oil again when I got home.

Didn't even register on the dipstick, now I must have a massive oil leak somewhere as all my oil is gone. I drove around for ages looking for my oil but couldn't find it.

While out, I bumped into a mate and asked him to help me look for my oil. I told him about my dipstick and he checked the oil. He told me the end had fallen off and that my oil was still in the sump.

I agreed so I went home, he was laughing at me which made me cry a bit. Then I toughened up and decided to sort it out. I put blue tack and chewy gum on the end of the dipstick to try and fish out the broken bit. After 38 tries I gave up, I had to, I had run out of bluetack as it had all fallen off and was in the sump.

****ed off I went inside and had a beer, then I came up with a brilliant idea, I would send a mouse down the dipstick hole and he could fish out all the chewy and blue tack and find the end of the dipstick.

But as usual I didnt think it through and I forgot to teach him to swim. He went down into the sump and I never heard from him again so I gather he drowned in the oil.

Now I have, the end of my dipstick, 2 packets of chewy, a whole pack of bluetack and a dead mouse in my sump.

Now what the **** do I do..............
__________________

[99AUXR]

Add more oil to decrease the PPM.