Qantas Humour - Page 2

GXL078 · 24-11-2006, 08:58 AM

My brother in law worked on QANTAS's computer system as one of his contracts. He said you wouldn't believe how many near misses QANTAS have had and they have been extremely lucky. They covered up the overshoot of the runway in Bangkok pretty well. There are pics of it here: http://www.airdisaster.com/photos/qf1/photo.shtml I like #3 showing the 1st class slide deployed on top of a tree!

Miss_XR6 · 24-11-2006, 09:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by auslandau

.....Flew Air China in China this year. When the plane touches down and comes to a stop, everyone claps.

they do the same in japan i think its a cultural thing or something
they also do it on take off

GXL078 · 24-11-2006, 09:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss_XR6

they do the same in japan i think its a cultural thing or something
they also do it on take off

Koreans as well, actually the Aussie football team did it when we touched down in Brisbane. I flew Korean airlines all the way to London. It was $1000 cheaper than BA 3-4 hours less, cause they fly over dodgy Russian airspace. I'm still alive.

Dark Horse · 24-11-2006, 11:01 AM

Another 'humourous aviation oriented repost'.

I find it funny because it's so technically incorrect.

P: Test flight OK; except auto-land very rough
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft

LOL, I wonder what the APP button does on the MCP prior to ILS intercept? Oooh that's right all three CMD buttons light up and hey presto the Flight Director displays LOC and GS, and a green LAND 3 status lights up briefly to confirm it's got autoland!

P: Target radar hums
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

I suppose if "Target Radar" could be replaced with TCAS II for a little more authenticity, it already comes with lyrics such as Traffic! Traffic!, Maintain Vertical Speed! Maintain!, Climb! Climb! and other such lively tunes.

P: Number 3 engine missing
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search

ROFL

Most of the Qantas fleet do not have a No. 3 engine on the right wing these days.

Ok, enough of that.

I've just dug up ATSB Technical Analysis Report No. 01/03 (I don't think it's available on the web anymore).

VH-TJN a Qantas 737-400 on departure from Hobart on 13 October 2000 suffered an internal engine failure of the #1 engine, tech crew returned the aircraft to Hobart. It had the potential to be quite catastrophic.

Disassembly and inspection of the CFM56-3C-1 engine traced the failure to the loss of a segment of trailing edge from a single high-pressure turbine blade. The passage of this segment into the low-pressure turbine subsequently caused severe overloading and blade damage to all four stages of the LPT (low pressure turbine) assembly.

The report has some very interesting metallographic images contained within.

Quote:

Originally Posted by 4.9 EF Futura

Lol, great thread to stumble across whilst I'm sitting at the airport waiting for a plane!!!!

I bought a book titled The Tombstone Imperative - The Truth About Air Safety from the bookshop in T3 (Qantas Domestic Terminal) prior to a flight to Melbourne. It was so interesting I was reading it not only on the flight to Melbourne but also on my connecting flights to Europe and the 'States as well.

Dauphin · 24-11-2006, 01:41 PM

I read most of it back in Australian Aviation magazine's humour section years ago.

I used to also enjoy the radio transcripts section that had amusing transcripts of air traffic control radio incidents heard over the air. Then they got rid of it due to legal issues or something.

Dauphin · 24-11-2006, 01:46 PM

I was reading the book "Black Box" written by an air investigator at the time of the 9/11 incidents and I used to read it to and from work on the tram every day. After it occured, I put it away for a while coz it just didn't feel right. Amazing book, though. Has anyone else read it?