Woman & shopping - love - sex - hee hee !

KEV EB XR8 · 13-12-2005, 07:41 AM

I've never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?"

I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....

Steffo · 13-12-2005, 08:26 AM

Repost 10 zillion billion million trillion etc...

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MO · 13-12-2005, 08:27 AM

Lol....

parawolf · 13-12-2005, 08:41 AM

Must say, thats the first time i've seen that one. Very humourous. Pondering sending it to the other half...

sbcb · 13-12-2005, 09:56 AM

Thats not an absolute rule for all of them, but for the majority I would say
- Amen brother.

RavenLS1 · 13-12-2005, 10:02 AM

lol :nutsycuck

red_hotxr6 · 13-12-2005, 10:26 AM

You really need to be a female to understand her point of view.

brenx · 13-12-2005, 01:07 PM

I find it very ammusing everytime it's posted as it's pretty much correct.

My wife wants me to buy her things but I refuse as she keeps making bad financial decisions which end up in me having to slave my butt off paying a loan off for a mistake she made. Current loans $17,500. One 3mths prior $27,000. Yes, it goes on and on. Rough total so far? Around $100,000-$150,000, possibly more? My wife doesn't understand how many $ she's wasted. She just says you spent your $ on the car, so you can't say anything. I say at least I have something so show for my money. She has nothing, which annoys me. I could have a nice car for the $ she's spent and the best bit? I wouldn't have had to do anything but drive it ;)

If I didn't love my wife. I would have been divorced many years ago.

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Feathers · 13-12-2005, 02:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by red_hotxr6

You really need to be a female to understand her point of view.

I am female, and I don't see it. I hate shopping.